Kids = Large Ego

You know that new commercial about the Volkswagen van commercial with Brooke Shields? You know where she states to not have a baby just for German engineering?

I am thinking I need to make a commercial. But my commercial will have a new approach. It will be why you SHOULD have kids. Main reason? Your ego.

That’s right. Your ego. I have decided that since I have given birth that my once larger than life ego has become so large I am shocked I can make it in the door.

Now I am sure some of you are scratching your heads thinking, “Um no actually my ego is down since after I had a baby I got this freak show of a body.”
I understand that. My body, I admit, will never look the same. BUT if like me you gained a gazillion few more pounds than you planned when you were pregnant since you took it as your one chance to order not one, but TWO large value meals at McDonalds and no one would look at you like you were a big fat pig hungry but PREGNANT, (not that I ever did this) Ahem, moving on.
Anyways if you DID gain a bunch of weight than you lost it like I did that right there is your first ego boost.
“Oh my! YOU had a baby? I never would have guessed you are SO thin.”

Of course if you didn’t lose the weight no worries there are other ego boosts to having a kid.
Case in point, the other day I was getting ready for work and Bean came around the corner. “Mommy you are SO pretty. Just like a princess.”
Yes I know I hugged him so hard and then slipped a 20 in his back pocket so he’ll know to keep those compliments coming.
What? Your kid never says you’re a princess? Hmmmm well how about this one.

I was cooking chili the other day and Bean came up and said, “What are you making?” I told him chili and he looked unimpressed.
Later when we were eating the chili Bean said, “Mommy you make the BEST chili ever. I love it!”

Ah yes. And I love the compliments.

Not a cooker you say? Well then this is my last shot to help you out.

Over the weekend Bean and I went shopping at a local outlet. There were people everywhere (um slow economy? Not at the outlet apparently) and I kept thinking that I was surrounded by morons.
Well this guy almost hit me but I managed to avoid him.
Bean piped up from the back, “Mommy! That man is a BAD driver. I am so glad you are a good driver.”
Ah yes apparently he has forgotten my little speeding incident from a few weeks ago.
What can I say? The kid remembers what he wants too.

So there you have it. Having a kid is the greatest ego booster ever. Even better than dare I say a new pair of shoes. After all the shoes can make you feel good but the kid tells you that you look good.
So I wonder who I can have in my commercial. Maybe Kate from the Jon & Kate show?